Wednesday, January 28, 2009

TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN


Dear Mr. Hanes,
I am writing to you today to voice a growing concern that I am having regarding your line of panties for women. Although this is by no means a new issue, I have found that it has reached a new, disturbing apex of anxiety for me. It has to do with the overwhelming number of choices that you offer. Now, I understand that we girls like our choices, and we are even prone to changing our minds several times in our constant search for "new and improved" products. But seriously? I find myself in the aisle at Target or Walmart, akin to a deer in headlights, all while trying to do something as simple as pick out a six-pack of undies. We used to have to choose between "granny panties" and high cut panties, cotton or mysterious silky blend fabrics, and plain or patterned. Now, you've brought on the hurt with additional choices such as "hipsters", "boy briefs", "low rise", and oh, I could go on and on. And the cute little sticker that says, "NO RIDE UP" and "WEDGIE FREE"?--shouldn't that just be a standard feature in a pair of underwear? I really hate to complain, and I really do understand progress, but it's getting increasingly difficult to explain to my husband and children that there will be no hot meal again tonight because I just couldn't make it out of the "unmentionables" aisle in under an hour and a half.
If you are open to suggestions, I would recommend that you limit your selections once again to just a handful, because more is just a pain in the butt, pardon the pun. Oh, and please keep the Bonus Pair Buy 6 get 1 Pair Free Cotton Multi Color No Ride Up Wedgie Free Hipsters on the list--I really like those.

Yours Until the Elastic is Shot,
Lori

12 comments:

ParentingPink said...

HaHa! Great post! I can totally relate! I'm often torn between the low rise bikini, regular bikini, and I'm still not really sure what a low-rise boy short thong is!!!! What??? LOL

Thanks for stopping by my SITS feature blog today! Love your blog - will be back to visit!

angie said...

I get the packages too, so I don't have go through the whole panty pickin' thing again for awhile. I can never remember what I like.

Bee and Rose said...

I JUST WENT THRU THIS VERY ORDEAL YESTERDAY!!! I kept picking up a package then putting it down and grabbing another...back to the first one...20 flippin' minutes had gone by when I finally resorted to the first darn pkg I looked at! OY! Soul sisters...you and me...

You give me the best fit of giggles ever!!!!

The Blonde Duck said...

LOL!

Bee and Rose said...

You are in for it now, lady!

I have bestowed 2, count 'em, 2 awards for you over at my bloggy today! Scit scat scoodle on over and grabby your blingy, nerdanderthal! lol!

your wedgie free friend,
dawn

Stesha said...

I 2nd this letter!

Hugs and Mocha,
Stesha

Tiffany said...

So funny! And i would like to add that i want a pack of all white. I know it's boring, but I'm ok with that.

Sass said...

I'm cracking up at this post! Found you through Mom Spark!!!

I'll definitely be back! ;)

Michelle said...

I probably shouldn't admit this, but ... I haven't bought underwear in YEARS. Like before Mister Man was born years. I had a huge supply from when I was single and had underwear to coordinate with all my cool bras, etc... and most of them are still going. I know I'm getting to the point where I'm going to have to buy more someday soon, and now I'm afraid. I'm very afraid!

And thanks so much for stopping by my blog yesterday on my SITS day. I had so much fun and am still wading through wonderful comments. I hope you enjoyed yourself and that you come back to visit soon!

{leah} said...

I'm with you wedgie free panties should be a givin!!!

And with all the choices of panties you have matching bras to go with.... more choices

Seeker said...

loved your post on this subject...came over from Bee and Rose...will return with laughs in mind....nice work

Laura Kay said...

So shall we assume that those not label are specially designed for wedgies?